Lifestyle / Thursday, June 7th, 2018

Hello, hi. Welcome back.

Guys, we have a problem.

This isn’t a new problem by any means but definitely a problem I can address now considering I have a place to.

The problems of a black girl.

Now, this came to mind due to the return of my guilty pleasure tv show: Love Island and if you don’t know about Love Island than I actually don’t know for you, it’s really the perfect trash TV.

I’m just going to assume you were all watching as I was and carry on.

Anyway, one of the contestants is a black girl called Samira and I respect her confidence because I for one, would never be involved in any kind of show like Love Island. My reasoning for this, is where the problem starts.

Samira is the only black girl in a sea of white faces and she’s gonna struggle.

I know this, the TL knows this, she probably knows this yet here we are. She’s going to be labelled the more aggressive one, she’s most likely to get picked last by the guys and she’s going to be everyone’s go to if they need twerking tips.

Beloved, you deserve better.

This is not Samira’s fault or any black girl’s fault, it quite simply comes with the territory of being a melanated queen,  and black girls know this. Which is why you couldn’t pay me enough to be on the show and also why I respect her. Knowing that this is inevitable and putting herself in that situation anyway? Yeah, that takes a whole lot of restraint, confidence, all of it.

We all know the statistic. Black girls are the lowest of the pyramid, seen as not so attractive even if we are all collectively bad b’s. Having this knowledge and still putting yourself forward for this big dating show that is overly powered by a race you can be pretty sure won’t find you as attractive as their own? Again, I respek it.

Samira’s Love Island debut is really making me sit down and think of all these little microaggressions I’ve experienced, whether it be being asked to cornrow a white colleague’s hair or being asked how I wash my braids (the answer is spray bottle with conditioner for those who were wondering xx). It also made me realise how much black girls let these things slide in the fear of seeming overly sensitive.

I don’t think we are though. In most scenarios, these little comments are made with our race in mind.


Personally, I play the role of the bigger person for peace of mind. Having to perpetuate the stereotype of the “angry black woman” by addressing issues just seems long in all honesty. I’m ok with just letting these comments slide over my skin at this point.

If I have energy that day, I may say something. For now though, I’ve accepted it as a standard and well, I guess that’s trash. There are definitely issues I won’t let slide but for the most part, I let microaggressions go. Again, that’s trash and not ok.

Still wouldn’t trade being a brownie for anything but acknowledging that being a black girl is tiresome sometimes is something I guess we all realise at times.

We still fly though boo, remember that xx

with all my love,


Follow Quite Frankly on Follow

Leave a Comment