THE EXPECTATIONS OF TWENTY-TWO | a birthday post


Lifestyle / Sunday, June 14th, 2020

Black lives matter today, tomorrow and always. Find ways to support the movement: here

Hello, hi. Welcome back guys.

It’s been a while hasn’t it, yikes.

Hope you’re all well and will still accept me after all this time.

I’ve actually had this one written for a while, but too much was going on in the world and my personal life so the timing of this post? It wasn’t it. When we last saw each other, we were talking about lockdown and how to keep it entertaining with the gift of music. Fast forward a month later and I’ve finished the exam portion of my postgrad degree, lockdown is easing up and we’ve made some positive changes for the Black Lives Matter movement. I also turned 22 about 2 weeks ago but let’s talk about it, I was on hiatus.

I was never a fan of birthdays as we should all know by now. I would give my thanks for the new year and truly keep it pushing. However, turning 21 last year surrounded by love and music was enough to change that. So, I decided to start being grateful for my birthday’s again and celebrate them. Unfortunate timing for me though, as my entry into 22 was during lockdown. My friends helped me make the most of it though so I had a great time regardless.

With another year of life, the cogs in my brain have started to turn. Already I’m thinking about the “expectations of twenty-two” and how despite still being a baby girl, a lot more will be expected of me. 21 was a good year and I achieved many of the goals I wanted to. Graduated, got my license, started postgrad but even then, there were expectations I wasn’t hitting. Two days after graduation I was getting hit with the “when will you marry?”. A whole 21 year old, baby girl me? My birthday was no different, my mum sneaked in that slick ” may she finds a good man” during her prayer.

It’s amazing how weird the 20s are, and how many of us are at different stages. Some people are parents, some people are studying and some are out there collecting their bag at a job. With that in mind, the expectations placed upon us are endless because we’re really at the age where anything goes. That’s probably why the questions come up a lot, because all of the above are possibilities. However, we forget that there is no age requirement for these things. The time in which you get them doesn’t change the fact that you have them. People are going back to study at 30, people are having babies and getting married later on in life and all of this is ok. There should be no expectation but yet here they are, right in front of us. In this current climate where so many things are going wrong in the world, where we see so many blatant forms of injustice? What I’m doing and the checkpoints that I’m hitting should not be anyone’s primary concern.

I’m 22, but still very much figuring out life. I don’t want to hear noise about things I have absolutely no control over. My pace is my pace. Don’t stress me.

So from 22 year old me to the rest of you, the expectations placed upon you should not change you. You’re doing your absolute best, and that’s enough.

It’s good to be back, see ya’ll in the next one.

with all my love,

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